By Samantha Pepito | PTV Public Affairs Intern
Just like seasons, people in life come and go; even though you fight to hold on, time has a habit of letting things slip away. With every new chapter in life, every new school or workplace, there are people you meet and people you let go—such is the passing of time.
There is, however, something consistent with every rainy, sunny, or cloudy day; no matter what, the sun is there to shine and the moon is there to guide. Some people are just meant to stay—a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on, always and forever.
Iskoolmates tackles the very issue of time and friendship, with host Tricia Bersano and three Gen Z guests reflecting on their friendships, how some have outgrown, and whether it is selfish or simply part of growing up.
What does it mean to “outgrow” a friendship?
For Gen Zs’ Dani, Michael, and Nichole, the process of “outgrowing” a friendship has their own special meaning—all shaped by the relationships they formed and lost growing up.
For Michael, friendships can either stay or go depending on where you are in life. He described the friends he made from every chapter of his book, whether it be childhood or college, who have all grown and faded as he moved forward in life. For him, while interests and environments change, so do we.
In Dani’s experience, outgrowing friendships is a gradual process, the slow realization that sometimes, some people simply aren’t compatible. Her experience revolved around how different priorities fit with different people—one just needs to realize it.
On the other hand, Nichole faces the other side of the coin; different priorities, compounded by a sudden and heartbreaking loss of a best friend.
Would you rather? Seasonal vs outgrown friends
The discussion then mellowed into simple revelations about friendships, with the conversation shifting into the ins and outs of relationships for not only the three guests, but for their lively host as well.
As the three explored their past and present, one question came to mind: What makes a seasonal friend different from a friend you’ve outgrown?
Dani is first to answer the question, explaining that her seasonal friends were special people she bonded with through common ground. For her, seasonal friends were people who may disappear from a certain phase in life, but will always be there for you.
“Outgrown friendships are outgrown because you aren’t in tune with them anymore.”
Nichole shared Dani’s sentiment, delving into quick stories about her seasonal friends that were as fleet as the wind, and outgrown friends that she found herself missing.
Guilt and growth
“How do you handle that kind of guilt? Na parang, wait lang, hindi na kami aligned kaya gusto kong sumeparate from you, and how do you bring that discussion with them?”
There is a guilt that comes with every ending, along with the subtle relief of knowing that another chapter is beginning. Tricia’s questions elicited an impactful message from the guests, with each of them arriving at the same answer: it was time to grow in their own ways.
Friendship is hard, especially when that friendship wasn’t meant to be a sun for all seasons. Everyone needs the time to grow, everyone has their own journeys to tackle, and it doesn’t have to always be with each other.
The episode ended with a gentle reminder that outgrowing things isn’t selfish; it is simply natural. When the time comes to part ways, one can think of it like what Michael said to Tricia: “Simply wish them the best and move forward.”
But should the time come for old paths to intertwine, it’s best to smile and enjoy life side by side.
dac/jpv
